How not to be an asshole on Twitter

The problem with Twitter is that it is far too easy for people to misunderstand you. And overreact.

Like when a bunch of ‘bros’ decided to gang up on me for this Tweet.

DudeWithAutisticKid: (Paraphrase) “So you’re saying autistic kids should stay at homelah? Never go out?”

That was only a bit of the nastiness I got over just 140 characters. Basically I was accused of singling out autistic kids, like the bitch I am.

First...where the heck did I say anything against autistic kids? Where in the 140 characters did I mention that? Please underline it in bold Sharpie and send me a copy in triplicate.

Second...autism has a whole spectrum. Personally I think it’s unfair to assume that ALL autistic kids act out and that the rowdy kid who can’t or won’t sit still is autistic.

Here’s the backstory – DudeWithAutisticKid has an autistic kid. His ‘bros’ are all protective about his kid so when DudeWithAutisticKid got offended by my Tweet, they all decided to be SuperMachoHeroBros and collectively diss me.

Now here’s my next offending Tweet:

Note that while both Tweets are about kids running around, they’re not really about the same thing. In the second Tweet, it’s about when kids are RUNNING IN DANGEROUS PLACES. Like where there are TABLECLOTHS.

A tablecloth with a hot teapot on it can be easily tugged by a kid and in 3 seconds, teapot is on kid’s head.

It’s serious enough that the NHS even advises parents to use non-slip table mats instead of table cloths.

Children are forces of nature. Forces of nature that require parents to keep their eyes on when in non-controlled environments.

Autistic kids’ parents have it rough – they have to be careful about triggers, sensitivities kids may have. While some high-functioning autistic kids get on well in public, autistic kids who can’t communicate well or are oversensitised or overreact to stimuli might need an extra pair of eyes.

Just last week I was in a lift with an autistic child. If you know how to look, you can tell – this little boy was pressing all the buttons in the lift while the dad ignored what the kid was doing.

If you’ve been around severely autistic kids like I have, you’ll notice the signs. How their body alignment seems off. A five or six-year-old who talks in gurgles or unintelligible babbles instead of speech.

The kid was hurting no one by messing with the lift buttons. So yeah, maybe the lift would stop a few more floors. It didn’t bother me.

But if said kid, heck if ANY KID was running around unsupervised in a restaurant, running under tables, pulling table cloths with no guardian in sight (or worse, guardian is busy gossiping in corner), I would probably not be amused.

Thing is, most parents of autistic kids I know watch their kids like hawks. They’re watching. Always watching. Always alert. Because their children were born in special circumstances, so they need more watching. I never need to worry about autistic kids because God knows, their parents don’t need telling.

It’s the parents who aren’t as careful that bug me. The ones who are gossiping in a corner while junior is running through the glassware section. The ones who are too busy shopping to notice that their kids aren’t in the same shop.

It’s because I care about your damn kid that I get mad if you’re not watching them. And it should be a good thing that I care.

So think about it when you leave your child unattended in a public place. Maybe the only thing between junior and a hot pot of tea on his head is the stranger who grabs him before he gets to yank at the cloth in the first place.

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